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Why People Love Snarky Memes Part II – Naked & Afraid

Why people like memes II Naked & Afraid

I am traveling a lot….like, I live out of a suitcase. Too bad Tumi has not created a suitcase for the female over-packer, blogger like myself. My friends think I am a gypsy and I think they are right because I have no idea what zip code I am in -usually. Right now, it is much easier for me to talk in memes. People don’t love to read unless it is 140 characters, give or take a few. Throw in a cute picture or a bright color combined with a snarky saying and you are set. But, it can’t just… Continue Reading

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Spammers Beware: I’m Snarky, Have Social Media & Know How To Use It

Spammer beware: I have social media an I know how to use it

So, you know those annoying email blasts you get from companies you may have visited once online or given your email address to a million years ago? This includes those sites that magically get your email address without your knowledge. Well, I hate those people. Like as much as I hate telemarketers who call at the crack of dawn waking up my precious Teddy Brewski and me from much needed slumber. Actually, I despise them. Look, if I want to be on your email list – I will let you know. But, if I signed up and don’t want emails… Continue Reading

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I’m Taking the Paws4Life Pledge from Purina® & Sam’s Club & You Should Too!

Purina Paws4Life Pledge

This is a sponsored post written by me on behalf of Purina® for IZEA. All opinions are 100% mine. I’m Taking the Paws4Life Pledge a happy pet is a healthy pet from Purina® & Sam’s Club & You Should Too! Come on! It is easy! Well, we all know that Teddy Brewski is my main dog man. I was so happy to pick him up yesterday as I have been traveling so much lately and he has been staying with my favorite dog trainers at Partner Dog Training in Cave Creek, Az. I highly recommend them, though I think he… Continue Reading

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Cox Business Proves Whatever Happens In Vegas Doesn’t Stay In Vegas: #GetStartedLV

Cox Business & Inc Magazine: Get Started Las Vegas

  Whoever said, “Whatever happens in Vegas stays in Vegas” doesn’t know twitter or social media, especially when Cox Business and Inc. Magazine are involved. If you have been following me via social media you know I was in Las Vegas last week courtesy of Cox Business for an event called Get Started Las Vegas at the Palms Hotel and Casino. First, can I tell you how much I love my job? Whoever said “Whatever happens in Vegas stays in Vegas” doesn’t know twitter and Cox Business #GetStartedLV Click To… Continue Reading

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21 Things I Can’t Travel Without

21 Things I Can’t Travel Without

If you have been keeping up with me that is better than what I am doing. I was actually in one place for longer than two months in July and August and my suitcase called to tell me that he needed a workout, so I obliged. People always tell me I need to put roots down but every time I try to put down the anchor other things pop up in my schedule that need to be attended to for work. Just this week, I traveled from Scottsdale, AZ to Beverly Hills, CA and then next week I will travel… Continue Reading

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Get Some Satisfaction: Win $100 Official USA Network’s “Satisfaction” Kit

win USA network kit worth $100

What gives you satisfaction? Do you measure your satisfaction by job success? Wealth? Love? Happiness? I think most of us would agree with Mick Jager when he sings “I can’t get no satisfaction” in life. Achieving satisfaction is harder than ever these days with the advent of technology. I am not talking getting to the next level of Candy Crush but I am talking about communication. Text messages, emails and non-verbal communication lead to many issues interpersonal relationships never experienced before (like mine). Like life was not complicated enough – now, we need to read between the lines and guess… Continue Reading

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Guydlines for a Fun Labor Day Weekend

labor day fun

For most of you, it is a long weekend. For social media people, it is never a weekend. Social Media never sleeps and as you all know – neither do I. But, I am promising myself that this weekend will be different. I am a liar. But, I am going to TRY really hard. You read it here first and I hate to let you down. At least I am tired this time from doing so many new things. I am “re-tired” after looking at all the pics I wanted to include in this post so let me try and… Continue Reading

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Run For Your Life: It’s A Singles Event

singles events and dating

Once upon a time there was a blonde, single girl who was a great catch but could not meet anyone normal so she decided to put on her big girl panties, black eyeliner, 6inch Louis Vuitton heels and try something new. Yes, the Louis may have been a little much for the 115 degree Arizona heat but she wanted to wear them so she did.  After getting lost in a second parking lot that week she arrives at her final destination, which is a group of young, active, singles looking to meet people just like them. And…. STOP right there…. Continue Reading

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Get On The Good Foot: Observations from a Rocker

Get on the Good Foot by James Brown is my jam

I learned a few things this weekend. 1. Melany is a very popular porn star name and I know this because when Google-ing my name (with the letter “Y” at the end) you will not find it on a Coke bottle, key chain but will find that it is a chosen name for a lot of porn stars. Just look at the images. Google it. See me in the midst of those women. Yeah. So, mom has looked into changing this melodic spelling for me legally. I will keep you updated. DISCLAIMER: I am not a porn star. Melanys is… Continue Reading

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I Got Social Last Night

#digeez

I went to my first Diamondbacks game last night courtesy of Cox Communication and CoxGiglife. I was invited by a person I follow on twitter and you know you are not in Los Angeles any more when you get invited to an event like that and they actually make it happen! It rocked but I have no more #hashtags to give for at least a few days.  Don’t quote me because that is a lie. Social Media events are always funny because everyone has to get their tweets or facebook posts in before everyone else. I am included in this… Continue Reading

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Funny Sayings That Make You Go HUH? In The Night

funny old saying

I was sitting at a bar last night, drinking my goose and soda while Bret Michaels sang to me, “Every Rose Has Its Thorn” and I wondered what the hell is he talking about because roses have way more than just one thorn? The cliché sayings that sound beautiful screeched in a high pitch tone, out of longhaired rocker’s mouths don’t always make sense. Yet, we sing and say things like these all the time. We use weird sayings to make sense of situations when we don’t understand or can’t explain what the hell is going on in any other way. Old sayings have been around forever and still apply today because people are weird and do stupid shit. History repeats itself (and there is another one) but so do stupid people who do stupid things so these terms come in handy. Here are some sayings and the immediate random thoughts that populate in the squishy, overthinking, ADD and OCD thing between my ears. -Karma is a bitch! So am I. But, if she is such a bitch – where has she been hiding… Continue Reading

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Got Wrinkles? Win $290 of Nerium AD Face & Body Firm Cream

WIn Nerium AD

Got wrinkles? There is an app for that and Melanysguydlines has an exclusive opportunity for you to get rid of your wrinkles without sticking needles in your face. People always card me and I tell them to limit their botox consumption because too much of anything is not a good look. Talking to you Mr. Manilow and Mrs. Kidman. But, after my moving ordeal with Jiminy, I felt like I was looking a little “worked” and worn out. My friend told me about this cream she was using on her face to reduce wrinkles, fine lines, redness and sent me… Continue Reading

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